2019 trials and tribulation · Faith · Life after a coma · Sickle Cell Disease · Survivors · Thoughts · Warriors

Teaching isn’t my job, it’s tied to my purpose.

Tomorrow begins the new academic year for school in my district. Part of me is excited and part of me is still physically healing, so I am concerned how I will begin this year.

A random stranger from this game app I play “words with friends”, asked what do I occupation wise, I said substitute teacher. He then asked is that by choice? I said ‘No, it’s God’s plan”. The minute I responded I realized it was really God’s plan. To be completely transparent with anyone. I never wanted to be a teacher except when I was about 10 years old, my thoughts on growing up is that I wanted to be a teacher, married and have 2 children, well here I am in my forties and only half of the three life dreams are reality. I have ONE child, NEVER married, I do have a Master’s degree in Education but not a teacher (I need to complete the teaching certification to finalize that), I don’t think I want to finalize it or mentally I can pass the test. But I don’t need a certification to educate.

I mentioned my brain damage from the coma brought on by sickle cell disease, well the testing results show’s I have cognitive damage that cannot be undo. So, putting that aside let’s see how I know this is God’s plan.

During my 3 years of obtaining my M.Ed. everyone kept saying so you want to be a teacher, I kept saying no, my undergrad is in Business management and Human Resource Management, I am good at that and I enjoy it. The Masters was only to keep me occupied in my retired age. My thoughts were to teach General Education Diploma GED or English as a Second Language (ESL). I was equipped for that journey because the weekend before I went in the coma I did a training course on working with the ESL software, and I had a volunteer job to help the Spanish speaking population volunteer center. Let’s just say that Monday came with a Sickle Cell Crisis, that led me into a full blown coma on Tuesday, September 9, 2014, and exactly 6 months of receiving my Degree on paper and in ink ready for framing.

Here I am barely a year from a coma and not even quite recovered telling my self I can take back “MY” life. (Notice the word “MY” life) I got so many doors slammed in my face trying to get a job. Frustrated and not where to turn, I didn’t understand what? where? why? where I was going. There were more road blocks than I ever could imagine. Then I began asking God, why he made me go through all this work on getting a perfect GPA, with student loans, that I cannot use. “I HAD PLANS”. you know the saying tell God you plans and he will laugh at you. Well, Heaven sure was laughing at me really loud. I had to humble myself and ask God to order my steps, where he leads I will follow not questions asked, where he sends me I will go. His plans are bigger than mine and better than mine. God prepared me for this journey, but I was to busy being stuck in my own way and my own plans.

By that time I had applied to so many jobs that I lost count, until I got a email for orientation for Substitute teaching for the county I lived in. I honestly didn’t remember applying to, I needed to show up and bring a copy of my final transcript and just like that I had a job. A total different job from what I dreamed of, in an arena that I knew nothing about, a setting I was not comfortable with. (I do not like public speaking)

There is something about my kid at heart personality that draws children to me, I have been a church children’s leader for 8 years and did a good job, so this was right up my alley. I was also still recovering from my brain damage so re-learning to read, write and converse again was more of the perfect therapy for me. This was 3 years ago, this new school year will be my 4th year, but I believe at the end of this school year I will be ready for the true purpose God has for me. I am not sure what it will be exactly but the preparation had brought me healing, patience and experience for the next chapter. I do know at the end of my life’s journey I want to know “I was the reason someone didn’t give up” I was the one who made some’s day. I was the reason someone smiled or laughed” And even though I have heard all those, I still believe I have more someone’s to cover in life. I won’t be doing much this year because once again another surgery ahead… but I will be doing as much as my body allows.


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